kindafooey:

bipolar-berry-crunch:

stirringwind:

guys what is ted cruz and donald trump’s ship name?

crump?

truz? 

The cool yet comfortable breeze ruffled Donald’s bleached hair as he leaned against the wooden railing, gazing longingly out at the rolling waves. He wanted to turn around, dear minority-hating God did he want to turn around, but he couldn’t face the conclusion that he’d come to after hearing the news from his clandestine lover’s mouth.

“You’re the Zodiac Killer,” he said aloud, emphasizing the final word bitterly.

Behind him he heard Ted shuffle nervously. “I thought you wouldn’t love me anymore if you knew.”

Donald sighed heavily. “I trusted you, Rafael. And you’re no better than one of them.”

Footsteps approached, muffled ever so slightly by the swollen wooden floor of the dock upon which they stood. “It doesn’t matter.” A pair of arms wrapped themselves around his midsection as the Senator whispered into his ear, tone drenched with megalomaniacal lust. “We can still make America great again.”

Donald’s miniscule heart clenched within his chest; he shrugged the other man off, grimacing at the sensation of loss that accompanied the gesture. “I’m sorry, Cruz. Now…I have to build a wall around my heart.”

WHAT IS THIS